Last week: 2-0 straight up, 2-0 against the spread
2015 playoffs: 8-2 straight up, 4-5-1 against the spread
Stop me when this sounds familiar…
So who’s playing? I only watch this for the commercials. I can’t wait for the halftime show! Ooh, Lady Gaga is singing the national anthem?
[You can put your hand down now]
I understand that the Super Bowl is an event, THE event that brings the mainstream to football. People that don’t know Cam Newton from Isaac Newton or think Peyton Manning is just the spokesperson for Papa John’s will flock to a party and congregate around a plate of nachos for all the wrong reasons. If you’re one of these people or have ever uttered one of the phrases mentioned above, you can just shut your computer off now and carry on about your business. Because the Super Bowl is at its core, still a football game, THE game. So that’s what this is all about.
If you’re already listened to Episode XLIII, you know I picked the Panthers to beat Denver 26-15, so Carolina -6.5 is my play. But as Jason and I touched on, there are literally hundreds of items, some not even football-related, that you can wager on. In fact, my Paisan in crime made an incredibly astute observation this week:
2015 playoffs: 8-2 straight up, 4-5-1 against the spread
Stop me when this sounds familiar…
So who’s playing? I only watch this for the commercials. I can’t wait for the halftime show! Ooh, Lady Gaga is singing the national anthem?
[You can put your hand down now]
I understand that the Super Bowl is an event, THE event that brings the mainstream to football. People that don’t know Cam Newton from Isaac Newton or think Peyton Manning is just the spokesperson for Papa John’s will flock to a party and congregate around a plate of nachos for all the wrong reasons. If you’re one of these people or have ever uttered one of the phrases mentioned above, you can just shut your computer off now and carry on about your business. Because the Super Bowl is at its core, still a football game, THE game. So that’s what this is all about.
If you’re already listened to Episode XLIII, you know I picked the Panthers to beat Denver 26-15, so Carolina -6.5 is my play. But as Jason and I touched on, there are literally hundreds of items, some not even football-related, that you can wager on. In fact, my Paisan in crime made an incredibly astute observation this week:
Here are a few of my favorite football bets. Remember if you take my advice and strike it rich, I do accept kickbacks. If you lose money because of this post, you’re a dumb-ass for listening to me.
Not Exactly Money Makers
Team to score first in the game: Carolina -150 (2/3) - I love this bet since the Panthers' M.O. in the playoffs so far has been to score early and often, build an unsurmountable lead and then cruise to the finish line.
Will the team that scores first win the game? Yes -160 (5/8) - Since I picked the Panthers to win and score first, this one is a no brainer.
Longest touchdown yardage in the game: Over 44 1/2 - With Newton's ability to scramble, can't you either see him breaking a 50 yard run, or chucking one to Ted Ginn Jr. after he takes the top off the defense? What about Manning throwing a 5-yard hitch to Emmanuel Sanders and he breaks it open? The over makes sense to me.
Lines to Line Your Pockets
Will there be a missed extra point? Yes +325 (13/4) - Despite the accuracy of Graham Gano and Brandon McManus, I like this bet because there are so many variables (bad turf, wind, pressure).
Will Cam Newton break the Super Bowl record for rushing yards by a QB: Yes +275 (11/4) - Riverboat Ron Rivera told the media this week that there no restrictions on Newton's running, and Cam's scrambling might be the biggest factor in negating the Denver pass rush. I say Newton smashes Steve McNair's record of 64 yards, maybe before halftime.
Will Luke Kuechly record a pick 6 in the game? Yes +600 (6/1) - He's had one in each of Carolina's two previous playoff games, and as much as Manning likes throwing to tight ends, I foresee Kuechly dragging Owen Daniels across the middle and taking a Manning duck to the house.
Will Peyton Manning throw a Pick 6 in the game? Yes +300 (3/1) - Piggy-backing on the last point, unless of course...
Will either back-up QB take a snap in the game? Yes +200 (2/1) - ...Brock Osweiler relieves Manning, either due to injury or inefficiency and he serves up the house call. Maybe not as likely, but still possible.
The Locks
Will the announcers mention that Gary Kubiak was John Elway's back-up during the broadcast? Yes +120 (6/5) - Not great odds, but when you figure that Elway will be on TV five thousand times, Nantz and Simms will take one of those opportunities to recall Kubiak's history as a player. Nantz especially is a sap for that type of stuff.
Will there be a penalty for excessive celebration? Yes +250 (5/2) - The Panthers take selfies in the middle of the game, what's to stop them from having a ten-person dance party in the end zone after a score?
How many times will the Golden Gate Bridge be shown during the broadcast (from kickoff to final whistle, excluding halftime)? Over 0.5 - With all of the commercial breaks and accompanying blimp shots, the Bridge will get more air time than Archie Manning.
The Longest of Shots
Will there be a score in the first one minute and thirty seconds of the game? Yes +1000 (10/1) - If this one hits, everyone at the party will be running for the kitchen and stuffing their faces until halftime...except when they have to run back into the living room to watch the commercials.
Not Exactly Money Makers
Team to score first in the game: Carolina -150 (2/3) - I love this bet since the Panthers' M.O. in the playoffs so far has been to score early and often, build an unsurmountable lead and then cruise to the finish line.
Will the team that scores first win the game? Yes -160 (5/8) - Since I picked the Panthers to win and score first, this one is a no brainer.
Longest touchdown yardage in the game: Over 44 1/2 - With Newton's ability to scramble, can't you either see him breaking a 50 yard run, or chucking one to Ted Ginn Jr. after he takes the top off the defense? What about Manning throwing a 5-yard hitch to Emmanuel Sanders and he breaks it open? The over makes sense to me.
Lines to Line Your Pockets
Will there be a missed extra point? Yes +325 (13/4) - Despite the accuracy of Graham Gano and Brandon McManus, I like this bet because there are so many variables (bad turf, wind, pressure).
Will Cam Newton break the Super Bowl record for rushing yards by a QB: Yes +275 (11/4) - Riverboat Ron Rivera told the media this week that there no restrictions on Newton's running, and Cam's scrambling might be the biggest factor in negating the Denver pass rush. I say Newton smashes Steve McNair's record of 64 yards, maybe before halftime.
Will Luke Kuechly record a pick 6 in the game? Yes +600 (6/1) - He's had one in each of Carolina's two previous playoff games, and as much as Manning likes throwing to tight ends, I foresee Kuechly dragging Owen Daniels across the middle and taking a Manning duck to the house.
Will Peyton Manning throw a Pick 6 in the game? Yes +300 (3/1) - Piggy-backing on the last point, unless of course...
Will either back-up QB take a snap in the game? Yes +200 (2/1) - ...Brock Osweiler relieves Manning, either due to injury or inefficiency and he serves up the house call. Maybe not as likely, but still possible.
The Locks
Will the announcers mention that Gary Kubiak was John Elway's back-up during the broadcast? Yes +120 (6/5) - Not great odds, but when you figure that Elway will be on TV five thousand times, Nantz and Simms will take one of those opportunities to recall Kubiak's history as a player. Nantz especially is a sap for that type of stuff.
Will there be a penalty for excessive celebration? Yes +250 (5/2) - The Panthers take selfies in the middle of the game, what's to stop them from having a ten-person dance party in the end zone after a score?
How many times will the Golden Gate Bridge be shown during the broadcast (from kickoff to final whistle, excluding halftime)? Over 0.5 - With all of the commercial breaks and accompanying blimp shots, the Bridge will get more air time than Archie Manning.
The Longest of Shots
Will there be a score in the first one minute and thirty seconds of the game? Yes +1000 (10/1) - If this one hits, everyone at the party will be running for the kitchen and stuffing their faces until halftime...except when they have to run back into the living room to watch the commercials.